Desperatemomma's Blog

The bond between a desperate momma & her boy !!

The Deceased Wing !


‘No, i can do it myself”

‘Pls stop bothering me. I need my space”.

The independent girl – becomes the dependent wife. After having been independent for all the years she is, but forced by the society to take the lower hand only because she is married. Marriage is so much a symbiotic relationship, which later turns to balance low on her side. The society that sees her individuality before marriage, sees her as a deceased wing that no longer can fly on its own. The wing needs an aid all its life.

Yes, even before she could ask for it. Dreams are no longer hers, choices are no longer hers. While marriage does no injustice to him, it treats her with sheer brutality. Being flung inside the doors of the kitchen, she sees no doors of exit. There’s no time for her passion, but the needs of the family. Every Tom & Dick has to be attended to. Every Harry & Hen has to be tended to.

When the society sees him as a higher being, who can while away the entire day drawing attention for all his needs-She looks around for the next word while she sits up for a while. Son in laws become sons, while daughter in laws will remain daughter in laws.

He is seen with such respect, while she is still not their own. It is fair for him to take care of his parents till eternity, and it is also fair on her to take care of his parents till eternity. She is given the “good”tag once she lets go the reins of her family and consider his as her own. Cutting the long story short is going to make no difference in the society that is still cutting off her wings . Give her some space, let her fly.

Offering to help before she asks for , is cutting her wings off. Don’t let her be yet another deceased wing !!




Hope (s) of Refuge (‘e) . !!

A dream I always fantasize,
All these years – A dream in my mind sown.
A home to call my own
A dream I’ve long known.

How I wish we to a land would belong ;
How much a good friend I long
Always from one place to another,
No one to care or about us bother.

We never belong any where !
Not a soul about us doth care.
Every country wanted us out ,
Crying help we did shout !!!

War & bombs me doth surround,
I see shattered bodies and blood around.
I cry aloud – in vain
Nothing to wipe away my pain.

Days and months pass ,
We still move on
The thoughts of the recent past-
All forgotten and gone.

I fantasize a dream,
A home of my own
Impossible hopes it may seem-
Yet- I still dream.


Fate decides it all.
Some born with a silver spoon,
Some, poverty a boon.
A mere penny decides the stand.

The poor man works to earn it;
The rich to keep it
The layman  slogs tough,
The latter life seems not too rough .

Big money matters !!!!
But, it all starts with a single penny.
Without which –

Pangs of Critic . . .

Eyes of shame, ah !! You society.,
Sucking away her dream
So partial you seem.
So what if she a woman born.
Stop all you critics ,
Give her choices to pick.

She is no less,
Nor you too high
She doth have wings that could fly high .
Let your attitude pass away
A breakthrough she needs her way .

Women are no low,
Let go her wings & to you she would show.
Standards high , supressed inside :
No longer they , to take a hide.
Step away and let your murmurs pass
An independent woman she will be forever last.

Spots O’er love…

Here comes my doe,
She’s too shy to show
Such a beauty,
Spots so a pretty.

Skin so much a glow
Spots too much to show
Glaring at my horns
She winks away without much a warn.


What do you do all day long ? Cant you clear the ■ mess ■

So what do you do in your free time ? Someone asked me.
You really think I have the time to myself.  Well not really.  Being a full time mom demands so much , so much that you tend to initially underestimate yourself.  And that is the greatest mistake you make. 
By letting the world know ur weaker side you are asking to be scorned at or looked down for every little speck of dust at home.
Never ever confess that you found the day a little better cos that is when the household tend to pull you down with “What do you do all day long; cant you clear the mess” ..

Men, Well all men for that matter look up to their mothers and quote their upbringing. But they dont realise the bitter truth that they grew in a neighbourhood that did not demand so much pampering or protection.  Babies are messy , all babies have messy homes and mothers clean and clear. Yet again babies mess around . What men dont understand is that a stay at home mom has other work to complete rather than keep cleaning & clearing.

A hot cup of coffee seems a dream come true. A dinner out with a yell about the baby chewing his shirt. Beds not made, dishes not done, clothes not folded …. Grow up man.
Stop complaining and start growing. 
Get to the real world.
We slog 24*7.
Babies slog too – to get the home even messier.
From dawn to dusk the house gets its needful. But we aint machines.  Just accept it and learn to live with the stratergy “Happy babies have messy homes….

12 signs of a first time mom :p

Allright., I know there are many many signs that tell you a first time mom. Some signs I found valid enough

1) The smell of fresh poop/pee : 
           Ah ! There again you have been peed upon. The very first sign of a new momma.  Damn tired to even bother. The smell of poo or pee lingers around so much , at one point u feel it no different.  !

2) Thats the spot, Yeah that one :
          Ever had anyone point you the yellow stain the poop left behind.? There are always those yellow patterns letting you decide between keeping them or getting a change over.

3) The sleep fantacies :
         A thing that every mom silently dreams of. Rather Fantasised.  Even an extra minute of sleep, seems bliss.  Those few “extra” minutes your baby decides to give you is really the other side of heaven. 

4) Black patches speak :
           Look close,  even closer… Found them ? Yeah, those blackies under the eye. They are compliments of the night fairy for having guarded town all night with not a wink or a moment of diversion. 

5) Sizes matter :
         Ever glared. ; Let me put it better… Rather, stared at the mirror version of you… The clothes squeezing its way out.? Ah., they call it the post baby weight ( How I wish it really dint exist? ) Sadly., it does & nothing could be done except for workouts or maybe you could fantasise you are 3 sizes smaller.  ( Like I do :p )

6) A regret deep within :
        After days of no sleep & bones tiring you wished that someone had told you what it was to be a mom. Maybe you would not have been in a hurry,… ( Dont tell me you never had the slightest thought or rather never missed being single !!! )

7) Temper tantrums :
          The baby has been keeping you awake all night and a fist of anger plays in, when sleep plays out. Ah., those days you wonder,  when you had no reason to wake early or get pooed or pissed over. Wish those days could be brought back over again..,

8) Selflessness :
         What had still then been a “me” attitude,  takes a diversion to “for the baby”. Everything you buy , or pick at a store is for the baby. Your shopping list loses weight while the baby’s adds over.

9) Hyper excitability : 
        This is such an insane attitude.  Rather the night fairy’s blessings to mom$ I guess. The baby is quiet and tired,  sleeping sound. You wake all of a sudden ( many a times, every hourly or so) just to check if the baby is sleeping fine.

10) Photo * Mania (c) :
            Allright momma, everyone knows your baby is such a darling.  And plays cutie cute . Why are you so obsessed in clicking a million pictures a day ? Is a picture a day not enough to speak memories ?

11) The invisible play :
           Wishing you could go invisible for atleast a few hours to catch back some sleep. Just to be a part of the outside world with literally nothing in mind. Just you & your happy self.

12) Status update :
          Oh yeah., I have my tired self longing for some sleep.  Yet how could I catch some sleep till I let d world know what I am going thru or rather showcase the million pics I click my baby each day.
         You better like it huh !!! And, dont forget to add comments like “What an angel”., “Oh my, what a cutie pie ” .. ” The next model for the baby product ad” … !!!
   Psssst….. let me tell you a secret . ( You like my pic, I will like yours too )

Going crazy, going insane, going nuts, insomniac. ?.. Say wat so ever. A little smile and that makes all worth it. Watching your baby grow each day is sure a blessing 🙂

The Burrrrrrrrrrrp Thing !

Enough mom, I am done. Burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp !
Babies & food validate the rivalry reason so well. As tiny as he is Baby T knows meal time & prepares war earlier. The tricks & techniques have been well mastered and done perfect. 
1) “Tear” it out :- you can read it either way. TEAR it out or TARE it out. The strongest and the most effective weapon of all times.
2) Look for help :- There sure is someone around who can get me out of this., Aint it ? Baby T looks around. Spotted !! TEAR it out. Rescued.
3) Cough it out :- The blackmail technique.  The spoon goes in, I cough cough & cough.   You got to stop mom , for the fear of me choking.
4) The Cereal Facepack :- Come on mom, its for free. Yeah, a free cereal facepack.  Doesn’t it sound burrrrrrrrrp.( Sorry.,) Yummmmmm.
5) The neckband :- Tiny drops find journey from his mouth to the neck forming a perfect layer on the neck . Thus a neckband. (A lot messy thou)
6) Spillproof(d) :- I don’t spill my food mom. I gargle it out. Glug glug glug., It’s all done.

A little something that makes me laugh. My boy is growing. ! And yeah., the food thing is making him discover – Well, yeah discover new tricks & techniques each day !! #HAPPYMOMMA#

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